Today is the 81st day, can you believe it? I wonder how many of my emails you all have read. Some, all, barely? I hear from some of you but its nice to get check-ins from you all. 🙂 Hope you enjoyed your weekend.
You know, I cut my hair off the other week, it was pretty spontaneous. The haircut and the color both turned out to be done awfully bad. I’m not sure if its related but my hairdresser was fired days later. I had a friend come in and repair it but my hair looks nothing like it used to and I prefer it the old way. And, I can’t say for sure if I’d like it more than my old hair if it looks the way I wanted it to. And everyones so fast to say “Well, it will grow back.” And that’s true, it will in two years or maybe one year with daily Biotin, but isn’t it so easy for us to tell others not to worry? We are exceptional advice givers and have a harder time doing what we say.
And why is that? Is it the distinction between perspective and action? Or is it being able to see ourselves less clearly? Or more clearly? Or is it us just projecting our ‘crap’ onto others? At any rate, I often have found people are very empowered giving others advice they didn’t ask for. I don’t ever say “Oh I’m so upset about my hair, do you have any advice for me?” Its simply, I don’t prefer my hair responded with “Oh don’t worry it’ll grow back.” Whats my point I’m sure you’re asking if you’ve read this far.
My point is this: Why do we do that? Or first jump instinct is to provide something for someone, to give some help or advice or coaching instead of just being with that person. I personally would rather have someone laugh with me about it then come into the space of fixing it. That’s just me, of course. But the point is still, instead of these triggered and automated responses, where can I just be with someone?
Where am I just using automated responses verbally or actually? Where am I being inauthentic? Where am I just comforting someone when they don’t want or need to be comforted?
I can be honest in that a lot of my strengths in my personality are about helping others and I’m sure that bleeds into spaces it doesn’t need to be or is wanted. So, today, I’m forgiving myself for getting this haircut, (joke) for automated responses, I’m forgiving others for assuming I need something when I haven’t pointed to that, and I’m going to be in the moment, bringing to the table the interaction with that individual instead of pre-determined responses. How are you doing? “Good” is another example of a blanket response with no real interaction.
So, lets make it a day to be present with others, to offer more than consolation, to be For Giving, and to For Getting of our previous automated responses.
Also, I revamped my work program yesterday, I’m starting my 21 days again today and will KYP! Last but not least, here’s today Karmatic focus:
7. THE LAW OF FOCUS
– You can not think of two things at the same time.
– When our focus is on Spiritual Values, it is impossible for us to have lower thoughts such as greed or anger.